So after last weeks surprising run down AF canyon and a short tempo Monday I was hopeful I could get under 3:14 for sure. I even thought a PR was possible but honestly my miles have been short (for me) and painful. Since my blog is NOW OPEN go ahead and read back from April on---Okay you will get the drift from beginning of August on. It has been the hardest Summer of my life since I suffered a major depressive episode when I was 17 that lasted a year after losing my father and sister in car accidents followed by my brother three years later also killed in a car accident. My depression this time was due to physical pain. What started out as plantar fascitis grew to envelope my hips, knees and ankle joints, also plagues of chronic fatigue, headaches and nausea. I honestly could not make sense of it only knowing that after I was very ill in April just before the Thanksgiving point half, about that time all of my joints and tendons were hurting more and more. Something seemed to be attacking my body. After numerous Dr. visits I have one diagnosis under control -- hemochromatosis (iron storage disease) and waiting for official diagnosis-- autoimmune seronegative joint disease. It is so hard to look in the mirror and think "I look normal" but then to struggle to get out of the bed in the morning. All summer I got out of bed walking like a mummy. Most mornings scared to get out of bed. I couldn't believe this was going to be "me" for the rest of my life. Miraculously after some strict diet changes, and celebrex and one last steroid injection in my flaming heel (not plantar) just part of the joint disease I came up on top just ONE week before SG. My training has all been forced. None of it felt fun until last Saturday (week before SG) when I ran with Jane and Kim for the first time. We ran down AF canyon fast. It was cold and that is what my joints liked. I think the very humid summer had something to do with the continual flare all summer. Anyway what I am getting at is truly ST george marathon # 9 was a MIRACLE for me. This is the first race I cried at. Yes, MILE 24 I was crying and smiling. I was so glad to be there and not be back in bed, lying flat wondering how to get out of bed. It was THAT bad. I prayed a lot. I had miracles happen through wonderful friends that care so much for me. Simply wonderful. I wasn't in top form at the starting line I wanted to stop at mile one. Very serious. I knew it was going to be tough for me to battle my fear of doing damage beyond repair with overdoing it on an already stressed body. Every step was cautious...til the final two miles where I just allowed myself to smile and cry. I started behind the elite corral even though I was allowed there. I started with Jane (three months post partum) and our plan was to have fun. We only ran 9 miles together (as she had very bad GI issues) and I was sad without her until I realized I wasn't going to see her. I had to just run. Here are my splits (just before being picked up by Jane I wrote some goal of 3:06:30 on the back of a cliff pace band, using the sg pace calculator, parenthesis are calculator, I only looked at them occasionally and gave up on it after 12 miles):
1st Half 1:35:48 : 2nd Half 1:31:23 (4 min 23 second negative split : D)
7:27 (7:10) never good to start behind by 1.5 minutes, we burned a lot of energy just to get this 7:27 moving around a huge crowd.
7:24 (7:19) Really not wanting to run. I can feel every crevice on the road with my foot joints. My shoes have 350 miles on them but I was too worried to get new ones just before a race. Nike Flyknit. They have helped me not pronate but cushion on forefoot is next to nil with all tread worn away. CRUD.
8:11 (7:40) Garmin downloaded showed my time as 3:06:40 for moving time so YUP a 32 second porta potty break. I needed to go but could have held it. Jane really needed to go and I didn't want to lose her. She ended up stopping again in two miles and we never saw each other again. She stopped 11 TIMES!! POOR girl. Other wise she felt great. Pretty awesome shape post baby!! FYI don't stop just before VEYO really really sucky to come out of port a potty and see my pace at 12 mm and have to climb veyo and watch it move slowly back to pace.
7:21 (7:27) Bye Jane. I told her what splits to hit and that we could do it. We can!!
7:39 (7:39) My butt is NUMB!!! I wore my skirt that has shorts underneath that DON'T breath well so all my sweat pulls in my backside and the windchill froze my butt. My IT band on left leg is really bugging. Probably from the frozen butt muscles. I try massaging while running and some kick backs. No over reacting. Just stay calm. I wore a fueling belt so I should have worn regular shorts. I wore the skirt cause it has one awesome pocket to hold lots of gu but I have lost weight and the skirt was falling down with all the gus so I had to use the belt. Wish I thought to just wear my shorts. Definitely a factor in my ability today. Sounds crazy if sweat doesn't whisk away it just adds to the problem of overheating/cooling. But I definitely just didn't let myself think too long about it cause can't do anything about it in the middle of the race :D.
6:48 (6:51) IT was here that I thought absolutely NO way. I just couldn't run fast down hill. IT was here that I regretted last weeks fast 12 miler at 6:36. I thought I was toast. I thought I was going to HIT a big wall. I tried my best to just put one foot in front of the other. Celebrex not working. My pelvic joints were on fire.
6:51 (6:41) definitely thought I was in trouble since 6:51 was all I could do on a steep down hill. But my joints and hamstring nerve pains were just not allowing me. Memories of mile 19 coming on strong. HOLD IT TOGETHER.
7:07 (7:05) thought last six were under 7....guess not. Bummer.
6:58 (7:10) See my watch at mile to go sign at 3:00 even. Told myself I got this. Not sure where I ran bad tangents, my watch after mile 15 was reading early. I may not have seen the seconds after 3:00 so maybe I was just delusional....but I ran ...
6:43 pace for 0.25 miles....yup darn bad tangents...but 0.05 isn't as bad as 0.27 miles over at Boston : D. I honestly thought I had the 3:06 based off the 3:00 on my watch....or I really would have pushed harder. I had it in me. I was elated. I was smiling and I was totally focused but I didn't realize I was 0.05 off the mark so I needed to push harder instead of cruising in. Seriously I just needed an APRIL moment. Darn it all!! Another 3:07....a SEVEN second PR. 14 seconds faster and I would have been forth in my division. 1 minute 12 seconds faster and I would have a COMPED entry into the SG marathon next year. Love when I read this AFTER the race. :D. BUT I have to have a reality check.... IT WAS A bad YEAR. I haven't raced since April !! Not one race. I did take on one pacing gig accidentally three weeks ago for the Spanish Fork Half . Somehow I was put on the roster. I showed up and did it. With too much time to spare. I hadn't done any pace work for months. So I had no idea. Anyway....I am trying not to be hard on myself. I was in no shape to run this well. It was a MIRACLE. AND the biggest miracle for my running career is YET to happen. SUBTHREE BABY!! SG MARATHON NUMBER 10 at 45!!! For now it is five weeks off from running. Happy FALL!!